What if you thought you had forgiven someone, yet you feel you still have some sort of resentment you can’t seem to figure out or let go of? 

Or you are experiencing residual sadness and anger that come up even after you feel you have truly forgiven someone.

What do you do?

There are a few different reasons why we might have some residual resentment, anger, or sadness even after we think we have forgiven someone.

1. We might have only forgiven them from our heads (as a decision) rather than from our hearts (spiritual understanding). 

If this is the case, we might still be seeing the problem more clearly than the relationship.

2. Another reason might be that we have not completely identified exactly WHAT needs to be forgiven, or additional repercussions keep arising that we weren’t aware of when we forgave originally. 

For instance, let’s say we forgave someone for a damaged car fender, but later we have to replace the tire, then our insurance goes up, and a year later there is a noise and vibration up in the fender that we have to get looked at. 

These additional features that we were unaware of when we forgave must be added to the cost and may require additional forgiveness!

These additional features that we were unaware of when we forgave must be added to the cost and may require additional forgiveness!

3. Another common reason for resentment is that we are not fully healed from the damage done and the pain is ongoing.

4. We could be experiencing “triggered memories” associated with an offense. For example, I might forgive my friend for lying to me, but discover that resentment keeps showing up because I have unresolved, and unforgiven issues from when my mother would lie to me as a child about her drinking.

No matter what the reason for your leftover resentment, anger, or sadness….

Getting curious with the question, “What do I need to know about this nagging resentment (or anger, or sadness) will likely prove helpful.

Journaling is an excellent way of gaining insight. 

And if that doesn’t provide you the answers you seek, schedule a complimentary consultation with me.  I’d love to see how I can help.

Click here to schedule a time that works for you.