Forgiveness is not a thing. It’s an act. It’s an action. To me, it’s a verb.~ Louisa Hext

In this deeply moving episode, I sit down with Louisa Hext, a remarkable forgiveness coach whose journey into this work began with profound personal connections to Holocaust survivors. As the former North American coordinator of the F Word Stories of Forgiveness exhibition, Louisa brings a unique perspective on how people navigate the challenging path from pain to peace.

Our conversation takes us through Louisa’s early experiences growing up in London, where her curiosity about human resilience was sparked by her family’s Holocaust survival story. She shares how her undergraduate work evolved from focusing solely on Holocaust education to embracing a broader understanding of peace education and human connection. Her graduate research, interviewing Jewish women Holocaust survivors, revealed powerful themes of relationship-building, hope, and survival that continue to influence her work today.

Eva used to dress in black, and she didn’t dress in black to be a person who’s living with class and sass and beauty. She did it to be dark, and she did it to hold onto her pain and suffering. And then one day… she stopped dressing in black. – Louisa Hext

The heart of our discussion centers on the extraordinary story of Eva Kor, a Holocaust survivor who made the radical choice to forgive her Nazi captors. Louisa’s personal relationship with Eva provides intimate insights into how forgiveness can serve as a form of personal healing – what Eva called her “form of chemotherapy.” We explore how Eva’s transformation from wearing black clothing to embracing bright blue symbolized her journey from pain to liberation through forgiveness.

Forgiveness, or to forgive, or to release your pain and suffering, whatever it is, or to make a choice and not know how has to be one of the most courageous things that one can do. And yet for so many, it’s considered a weakness. – Louisa Hext

Throughout our conversation, we delve into the misconceptions about forgiveness, emphasizing that it’s not an instantaneous process or a sign of weakness, but rather a courageous choice that often takes years to reach. Louisa shares valuable coaching insights, including her favorite question about what people “secretly desire” when it comes to forgiveness, and how this simple inquiry can open doors to deeper understanding.

We tackle important themes about the nature of resentment and the validity of our feelings, regardless of their scale compared to historical atrocities. Louisa emphasizes that forgiveness is an action – a verb – rather than a static state, and that the journey through discomfort and messiness is often more productive than trying to circumvent these difficult emotions.

I think forgiveness is love in action. – Brenda Reiss

The episode concludes with powerful insights about human nature and the complexity of good and evil, featuring Louisa’s sharing of Alexandr Solzhenitsyn’s profound quote about the line between good and evil running through every human heart. This conversation offers listeners practical wisdom for their own forgiveness journeys while honoring the profound impact that forgiveness can have on both personal and societal levels.

Thanks for listening, your support is greatly appreciated.

About Louisa Hext

Louisa is a skilled and experienced life coach, speaker, and storyteller. Her interest in the meaning of forgiveness originates from her almost 13 year tenure as the North American coordinator of the photographic exhibition, “The F Word: Stories of Forgiveness”, an initiative of the UK based “The Forgiveness Project”.

Louisa provides a safe space for inquiry to unpack and explore forgiveness with emotional awareness, empathy, compassion and non-judgment. Within her coaching practice she partners with her clients to explore a deeper understanding of their unique story and the capacity for self-transformation.

Louisa’s Website and Links:

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