Two years ago, I made one of the hardest decisions of my life: moving my husband into memory care. Last year, I shared the raw shock, grief, and guilt of that first year. This episode is about what the second year has taught me.
I thought year two would feel easier. More settled. Instead, it brought new crises, a nervous system stuck on high alert, and an unexpected moment that finally cracked my grief wide open. What followed was a deeper reckoning with loss, with old patterns of over-responsibility, and with the belief that love must be earned through self-sacrifice.
This is a reflection on how grief changes over time, how the body decides when it’s safe to feel, and what it looks like to slowly let go without abandoning love, and without abandoning myself..
In this episode, you’ll hear about:
- How grief can shift—and intensify—in the second year
- Why my body stayed in survival mode longer than I expected
- How caregiving can awaken old “good girl” and people-pleasing patterns
- What helped me begin letting go without guilt
- How I’m learning to care for myself while still loving deeply
Here are the episodes that I reference in the podcast:
- Episode 64: A Difference a Year Makes – https://brendareisscoaching.com/2025/01/14/a-difference-a-year-makes/
- Episode 94: The Good Girl Syndrome – How People-Pleasing Sneaks Into Adulthood (and How We Break Free) – https://brendareisscoaching.com/2025/12/21/the-good-girl-syndrome-how-people-pleasing-sneaks-into-adulthood-and-how-we-break-free/

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